No-one towed me out no this one was all under my own steam. I got myself here in this mess. Paddling along. Up and down like our home wifi which has been struggling to cope with the first proper Autumn dribbles.
The embers I call them. How appropriate. I digress.
I thought when I was told the cravings would be like waves I was kind of expecting the little ones you could boogie Board off. Oh no. Today we went big wave surfing. And it was scary. Like coming down a big hill on a bicycle way too fast and then suddenly noticing the fecking corner, that was my day, a few hills where I’d feel in control then seeing that corner knowing I was in trouble. Riding the wave and watching the gap you need to ride out of shrink faster than you’re catching it. Crap. I needed untold amounts of ginger biscuits, flapjacks and brownies, never mind that sushi nonsense (actually I quite like sushi) or Pret wraps no ALL I need today is sugar!!! And lots of it!!! Also though. I need to walk or run or jump about or scream or listen to loud music and sing really badly but I wouldn’t care because it’s LOUD YEAH!! But I can’t because when you’re a legal partner in an open plan office of a Blue Chip company and someone the grads are supposed to look up to you’re just not supposed to do that kind of stuff. 😤
Damn it. Day 7 sober. We made it this far though….I got through the gap. Just.